After reading Shiva’s entry Bobby looked up at the computer screen and then back down at the keys and to his amazement his hands were less than half their usual size. They were also red and sported black fingernails!
He instinctively fanned out his red wings and flapped them as fast as a bumblebee. As he rose off of the huge chair he gravitated towards the bathroom door. He flew around the corner and approached the mirror that was hanging on the opposite wall.
He quickly flew back to the computer and looked at the screen. It was no longer a black rectangle with white words printed across it. It was no longer top and tailed with strips of information like “file”, “Edit”, View” and “format” or words like “Edit document or press Alt to choose commands”.
It was the swirling vortex he’d seen in his pint after the demonstration on May 1st!
He hovered for a second and then “schlup!” it sucked him in.
The vortex receded into distance as he then flew backwards through a lozenge shaped castle window and out over a moat.
The vortex disappeared and a dragon popped its head out of the castle window. It wasn’t Plato.
“GOT YOU!” shouted Malthus, The Worm of Tory Towers.
Malthus grabbed Sydny Smith in his giant hand and held him tight.
The Worm of Tory Towers ruled The Stock Eggs Change in The Desolation of Cain. The Desolation was the first of many cancerous tumours that started growing in The Garden of Eden when The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was cut down. Each tumour was prevented from growing even bigger by five fifty-foot fire-breathing dragons as part of their job in defending The Tree of Life. One of their other jobs was to make sure that the new Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was growing safely. When this new tree was full-grown humans and reptiles would again be allowed back into The Garden of Eden.
Dragons were not strictly reptiles.
The areas of desolation were populated by all manner of cruel and greedy creatures. Some were evil dragons like the worm of Tory Towers. He and a spectre conjured up by an evil Fomorian sorcerer had successfully organised a coup and deposed the evil giant known as Julius. The sorcerer and the spectre had been destroyed when the forces of Cain were expelled from The Forest of Able but Malthus had survived and now ruled The Stock Eggs Change alone. The Exchange was where commodities were bought and sold. These commodities were things pillaged from The Garden of Eden.
The worm slapped Sydny down on a table in the castle he had been shot out of and wound metal straps around him.
“These are the late great sorcerer Anthrax’s Vivvy Section laboratories!” hissed the worm.
Sydny saw the Macmurderers burger insignia on a wall and recognised it as one of the symbols Anthrax and the spectre had used when they had attempted to destroy The Forest of Able.
“So now we have an unwilling human subject to experiment with. This will make a change from all those begging sycophants that we usually get from the heads of companies, governments, armies and religions. Their willingness to serve us merely betrays their ambitions where our thrones are concerned!” spat the worm.
“What do you mean human?” said Sydny as he looked down at his body. What he saw was not the red cherub he expected but the normally Earth-bound body of Bobby Rewind!
“You were bound by a Magick spell that prevented you from influencing human affairs when your forces were driven out of Able!” bellowed Sydny.
“Your experiments have enabled me to break that spell fool!” boomed Malthus obviously enjoying this moment as far as a twisted monster like him could enjoy anything.
Sydny immediately started pulling extreme expressions on Bobby’s face. It was as if Sydny was fast-forwarding a videotape with the “search” function in order to locate a particular countenance.
“Stop it!” shouted the worm with a look of dismay on his features. It was clear that Malthus was finding Sydny’s eccentric behaviour disturbing.
Sydny suddenly froze and held a particularly weird expression as if a video were suddenly freeze-framed. He had his mouth wide open, his eyes tightly shut and his overall demeanour was that of someone hysterically laughing. His body then flashed from that of Bobby to that of sydny and back again and continually alternated in a stroboscopic resonance that made it difficult to see either organism clearly.
“Stop it!” shouted the worm.
Sydny was suddenly inert. He still wore the hysterical silent scream that he had maintained whilst alternating between bodies but now he was in the form of Sydny Smith permanently.
Back on Earth Shiva screamed and drew a group of cops away from Bobby.
The metal straps suddenly burst loose and Sydny Smith sat up.
The cops had been giving Bobby a right kicking even though he had his arms hand-cuffed behind his back.
A group of them then threw Bobby into the back of a van. They then threw Shiva into the back of another van. They then threw Rasputeen into the back of a third van. They left Speedy Phil in the back of Shiva and Bobby’s “Lada”. They had beaten him up too! They had also stolen his money and his watch. His watch had been a present from his five year old son.
As Bobby was driven to Ladywell Police Station blood streamed down his face. He considered two things as he glowered at the overweight “grunt” who stared at him through a wall of wire mesh. One was that he wasn’t out of danger yet and the other was that Shiva, Rasputeen and Little Phil had almost certainly saved his life!
Those bastards weren’t gonna stop.... they were enjoying it too much!
Sydny Smith flew out of the castle window. The Worm of Tory Towers stuck his great head out after him and his jaws snapped shut missing Sydny by inches.
Sydny spun around and hovered in front of Malthus grinning.
“Come on worm....come and get me!”
The worm struggled to get his head nearer to Sydny and with every inch Malthus achieved Sydny hovered backwards by the same amount. The evil dragon was so angry that he just kept trying.
Sydny had been getting flashes of Bobby’s experiences with the cops and realised that the incidents on Earth and the incidents here on Eden were somehow linked.
“Ironic isn’t it.” said Sydny.
“Bastard!” said the worm.
“Ironic that in most Earth tales covering the subject it is the brave knight that rescues the maiden from the evil dragon. However, in this instance, it seems to be the bravery of Shiva that has got Bobby out of a potentially fatal situation. It seems her actions and the actions of Bobby’s friends have aided in my escape from you. Shiva initiating a rescue attempt has fused with my Magick here.”
The worm then realised that he was completely stuck in the lozenge shaped castle window.
It had been around 2:30 a.m. when the cop car had turned on its lights and siren. It was 7/6/2000 and Bobby was driving home from a “Headjam” gig at The Goldsmith’s Tavern in Deptford in Saaaarrrff Eeeeeaaast Lundun. Shiva sat next to him and Rasputeeeen and Speedy Phil sat in the back of the recently purchased Lada. Bobby was neither pissed nor was he driving unsafely. He’d driven after consuming two pints of beer before and knew that he was not only capable but that a breathalyser would undoubtedly read only an amber. He’d been breathalysed before on two occasions so he regarded this as fact.
Bobby immediately pulled over. A W.P.C. asked him to get out of the vehicle. She told him that he had his fog lights on. He apologised and told her that he had only had the car a few weeks and was still unsure of all its functions. He said that he was certainly unaware that he had had his fog lights on.
“Have you been drinking?” came the time-honoured question.
“One or two pints.” replied Bobby honestly.
“Right move to the front of the car.” said the W.P.C. She was now joined by a rather large male police constable. Without taking any of Bobby’s details the male copper produced a breathalyser. Without even checking whether Bobby was the actual owner of the vehicle he explained that if the light goes red it means that Bobby would have failed the test. Shiva got out of the car. Bobby was aware at this point that things were being rushed and felt a bit confused. He complied and blew into the tube. Without letting Bobby blow a prolonged breath the cunstable withdrew the machine. It had gone red.
“That’s weird. Two pints is usually an amber in my experience.” said Bobby. Can I have another go?”
“O.K.” said the cunstable.
Without even changing the tube on the machine Bobby was once again made to blow into it. Shiva pointed out that the tube should be replaced and the cunstable scowled at her. It went red so quickly that Bobby felt something was terribly wrong.
“Right you’re nicked!” said the cunstable. Bobby then asked if Shiva could go with him and was told no. Shiva pointed out that Bobby had the keys to their flat and, on top of that, expressed her concern that she had not been told where they were about to take him. She pointed out that they had not even taken anybody’s name and address.
“No!” came the reply again. This time it was the W.P.C. who spoke.
“C’mon,” said Bobby, “how many are there in your car?”
“Just us two.” said the W.P.C.
“Then surely there’s enough room.” said Bobby.
“We don’t have to take her anywhere!” spat the cunstable.
“Arrest me too then!” said Shiva. So far neither Shiva nor Bobby had risen their voices nor had they resisted arrest.
“Why can’t my girlfriend come with me?” asked Bobby calmly.
The cunstable then forced Bobby’s hands behind his back and slammed his head down onto the bonnet of the Lada with great force.
“Stop it! That isn’t necessary!” shouted Shiva. Rasputeeeen got out of the car.
The W.P.C. held a can of mace up to Shiva’s face and pushed her.
“Get back!” screamed the W.P.C.
The cunstable then cuffed one of Bobby’s hands and then, without cuffing the other hand he pulled Bobby’s cuffed hand behind his back and punched Bobby in the side of the head. Up to this point Bobby had been questioning but compliant. He had certainly not given the police any reason to believe that they were in any danger let alone physically resisting them! After the punch Bobby now felt as if he was in great danger. His only thought was that he repeat his request. He knew that violence would give them an excuse to say that he had started it so he kept repeating the question as the cunstable dragged him around on the floor.
“Why can’t my girlfriend come with me? Why can’t my girlfriend come with me? Why can’t my girlfriend come with me?” With Bobby hanging from the hand he held the handcuffs with the cunstable called for back up. Bobby had still not physically resisted. The cunstable then tried to pick Bobby up onto his feet but Bobby hung limp. Bobby heard someone shout “Leave him alone!” Bobby later found out that it had been a passing cab driver that had stopped when he saw Bobby’s treatment as he was driving past. The cunstable looked around at the man who protested and then extended a metal telescopic baton and coshed Bobby over the head. As Bobby felt blood stream down his face he was dimly aware that one or more members of the public were complaining about the cop’s behaviour. Before any of them could help three vans and a number of squad cars arrived. They must have been waiting nearby for they were there within seconds of the cunstable’s request. Three civilians grabbed Bobby away from the cunstable and Bobby thought it may be concerned members of the public. It was not. Both his hands were now cuffed. He was then dragged along the pavement. Somebody stamped on his wrist and somebody else slammed his face down on the concrete. He felt his chin swell immediately. Three plain clothes cunstables and four uniformed ones then started kicking Bobby as he lay in the street. He had still not resisted apart from asking his one question.... “Why can’t my girlfriend come with me?”
He was then picked up and his head was once again slammed down onto the bonnet of the Lada. This time he saw that the same thing was happening to Rasputeeeen who had obviously objected to the treatment of his friend.
Although Shiva, Rasputeeeen and Speedy Phil had displayed only verbal outrage Rasputeeeen, Shiva and Bobby were taken away.
Shiva had heard racist comments during her arrest and it had been a big male cunstable who had put her arm behind her back and pushed her against the side of a van.
Speedy Phil was left in the back of the Lada which, itself, was left on double red lines, on a bend in the road and right in front of some traffic lights within spitting distance of Greenwich Magistrate’s Court. Speedy Phil had also been beaten up!
While Bobby was being driven to an unknown destination he considered the possibility that he was being taken somewhere secret and that this was an overtly political situation. Shiva and Rasputeeeen had each been put in a separate van so nobody knew what had happened to their friends. Bobby did not feel scared. He was consumed with rage. Although blood dripped down his face he felt no pain. He was consumed by an utter hatred for all police. To him any cops that did not act like the thugs that had arrested him were accessories to the crimes that the thug element committed. From now on it was A.C.A.B. as far as he was concerned. All coppers are bastards!
Finally he was led out of the van and led into Lewisham Police Station. As he entered this church of hatred and bigotry he noticed three of the cops who had beaten him up. He turned to them....
“The last thing I heard when you cunts nicked me was my girlfriend screaming. If you have physically harmed her I promise that I will do it to you ten times over! If she’s dead I will kill each of you one by one with my bare hands and there isn’t a law in this fucking country that will save you!”
About fifteen coppers just stared at him. You could have heard a pin drop.
Bobby then headed straight for the desk sergeant. It should be noted at this point that the desk sergeant was around 60 years of age but the bastards that had beaten Bobby up were all under 25.
“Are you a moral man?” asked Bobby.
“Yes.” replied the senior grunt looking shocked at the question.
“Are you more moral than you were when you were 21?” asked Bobby.
“Yes.”
“Well I think I am too,” agreed Bobby. He continued.... “I suggest you personally investigate the work practices of that bastard there!” At this point Bobby pointed at the cunstable who had arrested him. “He’s a fucking barbarian and this is definitely NOT community policing!”
They read Bobby his rights (or lack of them) and asked him to sign several bits of paper.
“Don’t you think you ought to take these handcuffs off first.”
The police did so. It occurred to Bobby that they all seemed strangely subdued in the light of his outrage and he considered that they might not be that used to prisoners reacting in this manner.
While Bobby signed the forms he realised that he had no sensations in his right thumb and also realised that he could not bend it. He signed their papers anyway. He then continued probing their brains.... “Who the fuck do you think you are? Haven’t you bastards had enough bad press recently? Surely you don’t think we’re gonna’ let this go without hanging you out to fucking dry!”
The desk sergeant glowered at the cunstable who had kicked the whole thing off.
Then Shiva and Rasputeen were marched in.
Rasputeeeen.... “You bunch of bastards. Who the fuck do you think you are?”
Shiva.... “How dare you put your filthy hands on me!”
Rasputeeeen.... “What do you think we fucking are!?”
Shiva pointed to a smug looking plain-clothes copper who had come in with her.... “That one there’s a right bastard!” she said.
Another young copper approached the desk sergeant.... “C’mon sarge’ let’s book `em in quickly or are you a bit past it for this?”
The desk sergeant immediately started issuing forms.
“Hurry up old man.” Insisted the young copper. Bobby turned to the desk sergeant, “Don’t let that little cunt talk to you like that. Where’s your self-respect man?”
From then on Bobby only acknowledged the desk sergeant and chose to ignore the ignorant arse-holes around him. The cops who had brought in Shiva and Rasputeeeen had been jeering and making derisory comments but on seeing the rapport building between Bobby and the desk sergeant they fell quiet.
Shiva and Rasputeeeen were led away to separate cells and Bobby was kept at the desk. Bobby once again approached the sergeant as the elderly officer put Bobby’s possessions in plastic clippy bags.
“You know what I do?” said Bobby.
“What?” asked the desk sergeant.
“I’m a writer and a musician.”
“So?”
“Well.... it seems my right thumb is broken. I can’t move it at all.”
“So?”
“Well I’m gonna’ make you a promise.”
“What sort of promise?”
“I promise that when and if I get the full use of my right hand back I’m gonna write about this incident and you’ll be the first man to read it. You can then tell me whether or not you think it’s fair. Then, regardless of your opinions, I will distribute this story amongst as many people as I can so that they can be warned about the realities of police brutality because that’s what this fucking is!”
He was then led to a cell.
The Worm of Tory Towers burst out of the lozenge shaped window and brickwork sprayed everywhere. He flapped his wings wildly as he looked this way and that for the little cherub but Sydny Smith was long gone.
Bobby sat in his cell grinning. The blood on his face had hardened and it had obviously stopped pumping out of the open wound on the top of his head. The cops had offered to wipe it off but he had refused to let them touch him.
Eventually he was led out of his cell and into another room.
“This is Doctor Stott.” said the desk sergeant.
“I’m a police officer Mr Rewind.” said the doctor. He looked into Bobby’s eyes and took his blood pressure. Bobby was then breathalysed again on a complex piece of machinery that registered 51 on its screen. Bobby was told that 35 was a pass and anywhere between that and 49 was borderline. Bobby figured out that if 35 was two pints then 17 and a half was one pint. Three 17 and a halves were over 51 so his only having had two pints did not seem to be showing on their machinery. Bobby just grinned thinking what a load of bollocks this system was. According to the instrument in the station his result was a fail.
The doctor then took a blood sample. Bobby later found out that the cops should either take a blood sample or use the station’s breathalyser; not both. Anyway, fuck it, what should he expect from a bunch of bastards like this. At least he didn’t have to work in a stagnant environment like they did.
The sinister Doctor Stott then gave Bobby a card and said he may be suffering from a fractured skull. He was to show the card to anybody he was with between now and when he finally arrived at a hospital. The card warned that he may be suffering from concussion and that he may suffer fainting fits. Bobby asked if he could be taken to a hospital immediately and the sergeant and the doctor both ignored him! He also told the doctor that he could not move his thumb and that too was ignored.
He was then put back in a cell for a further five hours! Every time it looked like he was going to sleep a grunt would rush in and shout “Bobby Bobby wake up wake up!” This was coupled with severe bouts of shaking as he was roused.
He did ask about his right to make a phone call and was given the number of a solicitor at some point in the morning. He rang her from the duty desk and she told him, in a remarkably educated accent, that he was wasting her time and that she was off duty in five minutes. When Shiva was allowed the same call a man answered and laughed at her over the phone! Rasputeeeen was not even given the option. He was, however, given egg and beans on toast. So was Bobby. Bobby thought that it was truly the worst egg and beans on toast he had ever had. He felt confident in his assessment of the “meal” seeing as egg and beans on toast was a bit of a speciality of his. Shiva was not given a meal.
To Bobby this whole scene was running like a piece of fiction but to his astonishment it was all solid truth!
At about 7 a.m. he was led into a room with the cunstable and the W.P.C. who had started this whole shitty mess.
“I certainly don’t feel safe in a room with you two bastards!” he said.
“We’re just going to take your finger-prints and mug shots.” said the cunstable.
“Well personally I think it’s bad practice to put a victim of police violence in a room on his own with the perpetrators before a court has decided on the outcome of the situation.”
The W.P.C. (W.P.C. Blackburn) rounded on him....
“I don’t know what you’re moaning about. This country enjoys more freedom than most other countries.”
“Name one.” said Bobby.
The W.P.C. looked momentarily confused and then shouted....
“Your girlfriend attacked me!”
“Bullshit! If you think lying about public behaviour to cover your own crimes is a healthy way in which to uphold the law then you’d better go back home and really think fucking hard about you role in society lady.”
They photographed him and once again he refused to let them wipe the blood off of his face. As they took the three mug shots Bobby grinned with a determination not to look like your stereotypically grim criminal. They then took his prints and the W.P.C. tried to grab the thumb that Bobby couldn’t move.
“Get your fucking hands off that!” he spat, “I told the doctor that you cunts had probably broken it!”
The W.P.C. took his prints excluding his injured thumb.
Bobby was then informed that they were to take a DNA sample. He objected and they threatened him with more physical violence if he did not cooperate. They swabbed the inside of his mouth.
He turned to the W.P.C. and ignored the cunstable (P.C. Minice).
“Madam.... you were there when we suffered unprovoked police violence. Let it rest on your conscience if you lie about what happened! I remember everything, you remember everything and my conscience is as clear as an unmuddied lake..... as clear as an azure fucking sky!”
With that he was led back to the duty desk and charged with assaulting police officers. He was then given a month’s bail pending the results of the blood test and was given a court date for the following Friday in order to decide on the assault charge.
As he was led out into the reception area in front of the nick all he could say was.... “What a load of bollocks!”
Shiva and Rasputeeeen were treated similarly and had their prints, mug shots and swab recorded by the two arse-holes who kicked the whole thing off. They were both charged with assault aswell. They also both suffered a further charge of £500 worth of criminal damage to a police car and Rasputeeeen was charged with a further £10 worth of damage to the lapel on a police shirt!
LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES!
The three of them walked two miles back to the lada which was still on a double red parking exclusion zone next to traffic lights on a corner within spitting distance of Greenwich Magistrate’s Court. Bobby had asked for it to be moved so it did not pose a threat to other drivers and the cops had just laughed at him.
When they got to the car Speedy Phil was nowhere to be seen. They later found that he had gone to Lewisham Hospital to make a statement and have his injuries recorded. A doctor had told him that he’d witnessed a few too many injuries as a result of police violence recently. Speedy Phil had also had what little money he had and a wristwatch stolen off of him by the police! The watch had been the only present he had ever been given by his young son who was taken from him some years before by a fleeing partner. He had not seen his son since and had no idea if he would ever see him again. Speedy Phil was not happy with the cops. Suffice it to say that Speedy Phil was in a state of near psychosis when Shiva, Bobby and Rasputeeeen next caught up with him.
Shiva took photos of Bobby and Rasputeeeen’s injuries after they’d gone back to Shiva and Bobby’s and got their single reflex camera. They finally got to Greenwich Hospital. After a seven hour wait to see both doctors, X-ray specialists and a nurse in order to administer slings and plaster-casts it was finally concluded that Rasputeeeen had had his right elbow broken and Bobby had had his right wrist broken. The medical staff were furious about what the cops had done. When Bobby contacted his GP the receptionist referred to the cops as a bunch of “little Hitlers”.
On the Friday they were informed that Jack Straw (the Home Secretary) was upholding a law that forbids defendants who have been charged with assaulting the police from having a right to a jury. Jack Straw was, at present, trying to extend this lack of human rights to a variety of other charges. His excuse was that it would free up the crown court services for more “important” cases. It seemed to Bobby that Jack Straw was currying favour with his “friends” in the upper parts of the police hierarchy. After all the government needed the police to protect them from the public.
Shiva, Bobby and Rasputeeeen were also told that if the charges were satisfactory in the eyes of a stipendiary magistrate then all three of them would definitely go to prison.
Their brief managed to delay the next hearing until September 14th and the magistrate in Greenwich Magistrate’s Court awarded the three of them unconditional bail.